"You're such a good guy"

Okay, seriously. I'm sick of being the "nice guy". I don't care how cliche "nice guys finish last" is, it's really how life is.

I'm sick of everything. I'm sick of being there for everyone. I'm sick of caring about other people more than myself. I'm sick of worrying.

I always wonder to myself "why not me?" I always try to convince myself that I'm desirable, but I think I'm starting to lose faith in that. I try to do everything I can to be there for people who I care for, it's who I am.. Who I've always been. But now it seems that I'm more of a shoulder to cry on or a friend to be forgotten than anything more.

All I see are assholes constantly treating girls who I care for more than anything like complete shit. When they fuck up, I'm the one who is there, "comforting, caring". Meanwhile, they go out looking for the next piece of ass without a care in the world.

Whatever, it's all bullshit. These are the times that I debate going away, starting fresh. As much as I care for the friendships I have, I'm sick of feeling this way. I've invested too much time into trying to help people only to watch them ignore my advice and climb back into that hole they were in beforehand, only to come right back when they realized they fucked up.

Fuck being the nice guy. Fuck being there. I can't take that anymore.
I think it might be time for me to think for myself.